For those who have been faithfully following Gilagolf eversince our inception 3 years ago, you’d know that we generally do two things: Comment on golf courses and follow Tiger Woods rabidly. Of course, on the way, we get distracted by the LPGA, some random ramblings, and some disconnected advice on how to improve our swing, through the awesome and non-reasonable purchases of golf clubs over ebay.
But Yeah, generally, Golf Course and Tiger Woods.
Why Tiger Woods?
Because as mentioned before, he is the sole reason why many of us actually picked up this game and started playing, and continued playing despite being humiliated multiple times on the golf course by our retarded swings. Tiger was the inspiration and to us, he will always be no.1, not this current guy at No. 1 who resembles a duck, and has as much personality as a granite rock.
And guess what, Tiger tweets! His tweet is at http://twitter.com/TigerWoods. Although, my personal recommendation is that it will be as interesting as reading the Home Garden magazine; it’s his way of reaching out to his fans and being more ‘human’.
Tiger, if you so happen to read this, and you are among our 15-odd readers, here’s my advice:
Cut the crap.
Seriously. What’s “The Axe is back in Palo Alto where it belongs.” means? Why is it referencing some strange tradition in a college football game? Why are the tweets so boring, neutral and common? WHO CARES about your tweets, dude? We all know how robotic you are in interviews, so you’ll be the same in your tweets, going through the Nike censorship board and saying all the right things?
You should do two things: Shut down the twitter and facebook and start winning again, and being the cyborg alien golfer we all know you are; or use that twitter to taunt the other players or gossip about stuff they don’t let you talk about in interviews. You know what would be good? Here are some tweets you should be doing:
“I can’t wait to get back on the course and give that wanker Ernie Els another golf wedgie.”
“I have nicknamed the new World No 1 as the Mr Potato. How can a fat pumpkin like him beat me??”
“I need to build some confidence and bash some loser. I wonder where Stephen Ames is these days?”
“Rory sucks. Rory sucks. Rory sucks. Rory sucks. Rory sucks. Rory sucks. Rory sucks.”
“I’m pretty bored. Who wants to help me graffiti all the stupid new Accenture ads? Yaay!”
“Just had a hot date with Crystal Chandelier. I wonder why her mom would name her that…”