2014 and what does it bring?

It has been ages since I last updated. To be honest, there was nothing much happening in my golf world towards the end of the year. We didn’t try new courses and we were just recycling the same ones over and over.

I did lose my approach wedge in Nilai Springs the other day. So if anyone finds a Taylor Made LT approach wedge (steel shaft), that’s mine. Would really appreciate it if you can inform me on it.

Other than that, I’m making a point to be more serious about my game in 2014. I started playing golf around 2004 or so..so that means I am already in one decade playing this blasted game and I am STILL averaging around a 20 – 22 handicapper! That’s right. I’m still scoring around 92 – 96 per game. On good days, I can dip a little under 90. On bad, I blow up to 103 – 105. I used to be able to play to a 16 pretty easy, scoring around 86 – 88 on average. The main issues are my chipping and pitching. I suck at it…now even more than usual. I suddenly have forgotten how to do a simple chip. So much so that anything under 30 meters to the green I will putt. It’s ridiculous. It’s like a circus.

Anyway, I’ve been reading a lot on it and practicing, which seems to work in practice but once on the course, I turn into a radical jackass. I suppose it’s in the mind mostly, but I’m easily losing 4 – 5 strokes per game due to horrible chipping (or putting).

Aside from that, I hope everyone else’s games are on track for 2014. Happy Hacking everyone!

There’s something about Kajang Hill

I know it sounds a little presumptuous to say that there are courses that “doesn’t quite fit our eye.” That expression was made famous by a dude called Martin Kaymer when describing the hallowed Augusta, drawing universal derision from all sectors, including his own mother. Augusta doesn’t fit the eye?? It’s like a full blooded male saying, “Scarlett Johansson  doesn’t really fit my eye. I think Caesar from the Planet of the Apes is heck prettier.” But you know, whatever Martin’s inclination is, that’s personal. The fact is, he has the right to say those things because, ummm, he’s good. He’s not great, but he’s a lot better than me or my respected readers…no offense.

Where as for us, Hackers, to say something doesn’t fit the eye is even more ridiculous, because (speaking for myself), I suck at this game. I don’t have a consistent swing or a predictable ball flight, or even a guarantee that I would be able to hit the dang ball…there is no way a course set up has any inkling to my game, because at times it flies left, at times it flies right, at times it doesnt make past the red tees.

But if I were to say a course that doesn’t ‘fit my cock-eye’, it’d be Kajang Hill. I don’t know what about it…I just suck more than usual playing this course!

We teed up on the first nine and I actually played very well…aside from starting the 3 holes like a monkey, I know why: The first hole, a good drive saw my ball plugged into the rough. Playing competition, no way I could get it out. Double. Second hole, pull near the trees. Instead of being in the bunker or at least on the ground…it was literally perched on the roots! It took 3 shots to get out!

The back nine…Oh gosh. I was 11 over 4 holes. I OB-ed the first 3 holes with massive pulls, and almost OB-ed the fourth when my ball was stuck under the ledge in a bunker. WHAT THE…after that, I played good golf, but my gosh, what a string of lousy first 3 holes in my nines!

And this is not the first time. Previous adventures in Kajang Hill yielded the same result…white tee, blue tee no difference. Blue I struggle with the length. White, I struggle with the accuracy, constantly blasting my ball over the fairway OB.

I’m not saying Kajang Hill sucks. It doesn’t…but it’s slowly degrading since nobody bothers about maitenance. It’s closing down end of this year due to housing development I believe. What a crap-shoot. I need to play one more time here to redeem my pride!

Puasa Gilanalysis 26 – 33

Due to the puasa month, it was perhaps the most golf I’ve managed to played in years, including two tournaments, which I didn’t do too well. Here we go:

Gilanalysis 26: Rahman Putra

I hardly have any good outings in a course that I have been playing since 2005, and in all my games in the championship course, I don’t recall anytime that I broke a 90. Again, it was not to be, but having played an iffy front nine filled with bogeys, the back nine of 44 was a welcome sight.

Gilanalysis 27: Impian

It’s annoying when the game doesn’t come together after a good outing. I started very badly on the back nine, thanks to atrocious putting, which plagued me the entire game, with six three putted greens and 3-4 feet misses at least on 3 occasions. The course was great, the game was a wreck, even 5 pars couldn’t save it.

Gilanalysis 28: Danau

The mallet putter came back in play and was immediately proficient in Danau’s undulating greens, with just 30 putts. Played Danau’s familiar and easier back nine without any major issues, but the front nine was horrible. The first hole itself was a lost cause, with two balls into the drink. The second hole was perhaps the finest par I have, having landed my drive down into the valley of death on the right, and a SW onto the green.

Gilanalysis 29: Glenmarie Valley

Took Advantage of the great pricing at Glenmarie at RM80, and played the valley, where previous score had soared to 102. Teed off the back nine and had complete possession of my game, shooting in 43. For some unknown reason, that possession turned into crapnut on the front, having had my sandy par on the first, proceeded to play like a monkey on weed, shooting +10 in the next 4 holes, before steeling with a lucky 300m drive on the index 1 8th hole, skulling my SW which luckily got caught inches away from the water and parring it. +10 over 4 holes? YUCK.

Gilanalysis 30: Glenmarie Garden

Tournament play, but from the white tees, which really brings up the reality that no matter which tee we use, we will still suck regardless. Due to the white tees, a lot of hazards came into play but it was just a breakdown in the second nine, especially on the easy first, where two shanks led to a triple. On the Index 13, was left with an 8 iron after a great drive, and shank the devil out of it into OB. It’s true that once you shank once, you never really recover from it. I shanked 4 times in the back nine which is the golf equivalent to strapping yourself with TNT and jumping off a rocky cliff into a shark infested boiling water.

Gilanalysis 31: KGNS

The next tournament wasn’t that bad, even though the scores are about the same. At least there were no shanking involved. KGNS and I never really agree on any matter, and that might change, as I might be getting a membership there by the end of the year if all things go ok. It was a shotgun start, so I kicked it off at the par 3 fourth, promptly double bogeying my first two holes with some sorry putting, then steadied somewhat. It all came apart at the par 3 15th, a devilish difficult hole, where I thrashed my 3 wood into the water behind the green. I proceeded to hook my next tee shot into hazard, 3 putted the next hole for bogey. Basically, I was +11 over my first 11 holes and +11 for my next 6 holes before parring the last. How to win?

Gilanalysis 32: Impian

Thanks to the Puasa month, weekends were spent hacking golf courses that we wouldn’t otherwise even dream of going. My final outing in Impian for this Puasa was a good one,  but yet again, one nine was good, the other nine was absolutely poor. I seem to struggle a lot these days to put together two good nines. My first nine was just riddled with poor play, only eeking out a par on the final hole, but the back nine, started to play a lot better even if I wasn’t hitting fairways. The par 5 17th for instance, I hooked the ball so bad into the woods, I punched out with a 7, and found myself only 120m from the hole. It’s a weird and extremely easy par 5. I’ll miss Impian. Good greens and thank God we didn’t need to have caddies in all occasions we played there this year.

Gilanalysis 33: Nilai Springs Mango + Pines

Final game we squeezed in was Nilai Springs. After a good outing at Impian I was reasonably optimistic that I could at least break 90 on a relatively easy course. I started very well, +3 over 5 starting on the 10th. Then completely lost concentration over 15,16 and 17, due to some misunderstanding with my flight mate (we made up after, since we’re so easy going!), but the game never recovered after that. The main problem was easy: IRONS. I was completely messed up in my irons, not hitting a single good iron shot in and compounding that with 3 3-putts. Ah well. There’s always next year then.

To all muslim Gilagolfers, Selamat Hari Raya, drive safe, and welcome back to the golf!

Gilanalysis 25: Staffield

Handicap:20

Gross: 99

Net: 79

Verdict: Pulling all the way into OB….

Handicap:20

Gross: 87

Net: 67

Verdict: Once the driver is sorted, everything works!

What Happened

Staffield has always been somewhat of a favourite to us. But after a horrendous customer service experience (see the reviewed write up here), we’re doubtful if we should ever return here. In fact, Staffield has been relegated from a Must Play course to a Not Too shabby, in the only measurement system that makes sense to all golfers: The GilaChart.

The course remains an excellent golf course, no doubt, but that doesn’t give the golf management a reason to treat their customers only slightly better than a pile of dog crap, and slightly lower than how you’d treat mosquitoes. To justify them, only the golf manager sucks actually, the rest of the service blokes are OK.

The first game was not as bad as it seems. My first triple was due to 2 duffed chip, possibly due to morning jitters and lack of breakfast. The two double bogeys came from bad 3 putts. Staffield’s greens remain enigmatic as ever. It’s in good condition, but the breaks and the undulation, as well as the speed really just gets the best of us. The caddy says 8.5 on the stimp, but I doubt she realises what that means at all. Greens were FAST!! I don’t know how 8.5 is supposed to roll but I always thought it was slow, because KRPM plays to about 8 and it’s as slow as traffic in Tun Razak at 5 pm during Ramadhan month.

The back nine first game was where everything collapsed. Triple on the 11th due to pulling into the water. From 13 to 17, a stretch of five holes, I pulled almost every tee shot, especially with the driver, and each pull landed me either behind trees, hazards, or OB, water. By the time I reached the green, I was four on, five on, flustered, red with rage and obviously about to tomahawk my new driver into the grave. The worst was the awesome 16th, marked as 160meters, but ridiculously under measured by Staffield. We each used 3 wood, and only one managed to clear the bunkers and on. I plopped mine, yet again into water. Staffield, that hole plays 180 or more. No way it’s 160!

The only good thing came on the last, when I hit a 3 wood from the fairway to 5 meters of the green, putted and almost sank in for eagle.

And once all the lessons were learnt, the second game, driving went from being as curly as Rory’s hair to straight as an arrow on the back nine, as I shot 42, an improvement of a massive 9 shots on my back nine. I played the 87 to a thoroughly enjoyable golf, hitting irons in, and birdieing the 5th from the fairway bunker. The final hole was a replica, my 3 wood about 8 – 10 metres away and barely missing the 4 foot birdie putt. Argh!

But overall, except for memories of lousy golf manager in Staffield, it was the best golf I’ve played in a long time.

Why I Sucked

Easy. The first game, the new Hibore XLS was pulling all the way. Couldn’t figure it out, until the last hole, when it all clicked. I was addressing it too closed and grip too strong, because the S9-1 was a slicer, so I had to compensate for the slice with these. Hi-Bore XLS is draw biased all the way, so after neutraling the face and going easier on the grip, balls started booming straight and long. My mind still plays tricks on me occasionally expecting the ball to curve left to right, but the driver did its job, 9 fairways, 6 GIRs.

Putter was hot and cold. I missed a lot of putts within 5 feet, but managed to also hit long putts here and there, like the 8 foot curler for birdie on the 5th.

Not So Sucked

The new driver sucked at first, but started becoming my best pal by the time I was done.

What to Work On

Really exciting to work with the new driver, looking forward to the next game! Hacking time!

Gilanalysis 18: KGPA

Handicap:20

Gross: 101

Net: 81

Verdict: Blown away by KGPA!

What Happened

Every once in a while, you happen to have one game when you play so tremendously badly, that you don’t ever want to see golf, or pick up your clubs that you have tomahawked 3 feet into the ground, ever again.

Well, this ain’t one of it.

In fact, I was extremely surprised at how bad my scores were, considering I felt I was in somewhat control of my game. My strategy today was simple, keep it on the fairway and play conservative.

We teed up on the back nine, and I used my 3 wood almost for all the holes except for hole 12 and hole 18. I hit 5/7 fairways enroute to a strange 50. My first hole, I missed a 4 footer. Second hole, I put my hybrid in the drink. Par 5 12th, I hit a solid PW into the green only to see it roll off and I badly putted to a double. And Hole 13, a solid 9 iron was just off and I couldn’t get up and down.  Most of the double bogeys taken in the front nine, were brain-farts: duffed chip, topped chip, easy misses on the putts.

Crossing to the front nine, I started with consecutive triple with my 3 wood due to OBs, and I thought, what the heck, let’s go for the driver now and immediately played much better. My other triple was the excruciating Index 1 par 5. After the first one in the drink, I hit a pure 3 wood and left 160 meters up hill. I completely shanked my hybrid into the hazard and from there, it was just idiocy after idiocy until the end.

I felt I played better than the scores suggest, but hey, that’s only me, right? Curse KGPA and all the OBs!!!

Why I Sucked

My 3 wood was accurate but lacked the distance, so long irons sucked obviously  enroute to a grand total of ZERO greens in regulation. I think the conservative strategy is no good for KGPA. My irons and driver continue to give me nightmares.

Not So Sucked

While my putter was so so, my chipping were a lot better. I basically changed my stance to be lower and more like hitting from the bunker, as opposed to upright, like putting. It solved a lot of my duffed and top chips (though i still had here and there). Nice to know something you have worked on is finally working on the course!

What to Work On

Accuracy is key in KGPA, like Seri Selangor. I can’t imagine with my driver like a banana slice to score anything respectable on this course. What to work on? Maybe looking at playing at easier courses!

Gilanalysis 17: Rahman Putra Lakes

Handicap:20

Gross: 95

Net: 75

Verdict: Irons really cannot make it….

What Happened

It has been a somewhat long lay off and whats better than to go straight into Rahman Putra and try to score better than 99, which was eerily my score on this same course for 3 times in a row.

Rahman is in a pretty good condition lately, and teeing off the front nine is always welcoming. Except for hole number 2, I’d consider the front to be a lot more friendlier than the back nine. I was actually hitting the ball quite well front side, but the stupidest iron plays completely betrayed me. My eight iron in was massively disappointing, from duff, top and at one point, shank.

My best hit was probably on the par 4 6th, a blind hole that drops from fairway down to the hole. I cracked my 3 wood solid and it caught the hill, leaving me about 90 metres from the hole. I duffed my SW so bad that I still had about 20 metres to chip, which I did ok, and sank in a good 10 footer to save par.

Crossing over, my irons became a lot better, but then it was my driver that started acting up, especially in the last few holes. My 3 wood was longer and better than my driver, which kept slicing, and of course, once that happens, it’s survival mode, especially at the closing 3 holes in Rahman Putra.

Why I Sucked

It’s like my driver and irons are taking turns on shifts, like how I used to take the night shift when I was IT support long time back. So driver kicks in, irons check out. Irons sorted, driver checks out. Not one time in my memory did these two jokers come in together. If not for some good putting on the back nine, I would have blown a 100, or at least settled for my twillight zone score of 99.

Not So Sucked

I was re-using this old putter I had, a Bettinardi Baby Ben Hogan that looks like a murder weapon from Cluedo. It’s a nice putter that I havent been able to sell, and it was the putter that Jim Furyk used when he won the 2003 US Open. I don’t quite like the set up but man, does it roll straight.

What to Work On

At least I improved a little in Rahman. You’d think it being my home course and all I’d play well there, but never. I’m thinking of changing the driver. It hasn’t been the same since the day I reshafted (when I broke it at Danau and claimed insurance.) Incidentally, I broke that driver in early February and claimed it with Danau, and until today, each time I call that club, Danau folks will say, “Umm, tak tahu-lah, you try balik another month” translated in English to: “You are a complete moron to try to claim anything from us. You deserve a thousand deaths for your absolute stupidity.” I guess that’s what happens when you expect a little bit of customer service from a university course. Note to all: NEVER CLAIM ANY INSURANCE at Danau…it will probably come in time when I need to put my kids to college (and to note, my kids currently are not even created yet.)

Gilanalysis 16: Kinrara

Handicap:20

Gross: 92

Net: 72

Verdict: Two Birds, Two Pars and a Whole lot of Misses

What Happened

Kinrara. I played there earlier this year, had two pars and one birdie. And scored 92.

And my scores were 46-46. Which. Is. Exactly. The. Same. Score. Today.

Yikes, there’s some kind of twillight zone going on here for me!

The first hole is a Ginnifer Hole (meaning, wide, welcoming, you-will-never-mess this-up kind of hole), and yet, I managed to snap hook the heck out of my ball and into the big monsoon drain like 30 miles off from the fairway. I whacked a Triple on a Ginnifer. Crap start. I don’t remember EVER tripling this hole. Ever.

It was a rough start, but things turned around on hole 5, which is fast becoming my favourite hole, although it’s bloody difficult. A six iron was stuffed 3 feet from the hole, today, an accessible front pin. The thing is from Hole 1 to Hole 6, there is only one semi difficult hole, which is the par 5 second. Others are scoring holes. The 4th and 6th are baby par 4s. The 3rd is a baby par 3. But yet, in two games in Kinrara, I am +6 and +8 over these easy holes respectively. WHY SO LOUSY-LA??

I steadied the ship a bit with two pars on the ending holes, but the back nine was just a tale of misses. Miss drives, miss chips, miss putts, and mostly miss irons. The only high point was hitting a hybrid to 10 feet on the devilish hole 17, and sinking the uphill curler to take the game.

Why I Sucked (or WHY KINRARA SUCKED)

I usually don’t blame the course, but Kinrara really sucked. It has gone down the toilet since the last time I played. The fairways are HORRIBLE. An idiot forgot to turn off the sprinkler on hole 2 on the fairway. I think it has been weeks since it has been flowing, because the grass underneath has changed to moss (the ones you see in the monsoon drain), and turned to deep red. Like blood. What the heck?? The entire fairway was squishy, and the greens were not pressed and were in terrible need of maintenance. The rough? Holy cow. Almost Beruntung-like. Toilet seat standard. Terrible. I hit a good shot on the 11th over the trees to the left of the bunker and boom, 4 pair of eyes couldn’t find it. On hole 8, my 60 degree second shot flew the flag into a crowd of Bangladeshis just standing around a tractor chit chatting. They were literally standing on the green, and refused to move even when we shouted fore. Jeez! What the heck is wrong with the people here?!?!

All over, Kinrara is really in a bad shape. I’d advise gilagolfers to go somewhere else. They’re doing some maintenance in the clubhouse till October, and even the dressing room is in a sorry condition. No aircond. That’s just stupid. Most of the showers are not working. No water. The ones working (about 2, smelling like urine and faeces) had water that smell and taste like rust. On top of that, the renovation work is being hammered on top of the changing room, so you are suddenly filled with this awesome phobia that the roof will come down on top of you and you die, naked, in the a shower smelling like shit and urine. Come on, Kinrara, that’s just pathetic.

Ok, I played badly also, I admit, with my driver struggling as usual, and my irons and chips in such a crap state that I don’t really know what to do, except to continue doing what I do: duff, top, thin, fat. Sigh.

Not So Sucked

Let me see….not so suck….umm. Birdies were good, so the putting was reasonably ok…then again, I was experimenting with an old putter. I am a promiscuous putter-er in that sense, I like to change putters and experiment with blades, offsets, inserts, and what not. Oh yeah, I also was striping it with my hybrid and 3 wood, traditionally my bogey clubs. Feels good to hit 180 off the deck.

What to Work On

Wow, ok, let’s start with the driver. Fix it, please. I will figure it out on the range I guess. Irons are just up and down, off and on. I sound like a broken record, going about these two areas of the game over and over…..and over…and over…..

Gilanalysis 15: Staffield West and South

Handicap:20

Gross: 95

Net: 75

Verdict: I don’t understand why my clubs don’t come to work together?

What Happened + Mini Review

Staffield has always been a course that pretty consistently gives us high marks. Surprisingly, this is the first time I ever got a chance to review the West course. So aside from a gilanalysis, this is going to be a mini review of Staffield West. So away we go!

Some courses are easy on the eyes, the same way some women are, or some cars are: they don’t overwhelm you with massive good looks and just welcomes you home like a best friend, neither do they resemble a discarded banana skin on their best day. Case in point:

Something homely like Ginnifer:

vs something not so homely:

You don’t ever wanna get caught in a course that resembles the second one….take that, Bukit Beruntung, Frasers and Selesa Hills!

Staffield is Ginnifer Goodwin, welcoming, relaxed, homely…like a guy’s best girl friend whom you won’t fall in love with, but whom you like to hang around and talk crap to and crack stupid jokes with. Ah, good old college days.

I digress. Once you are on the first tee on the homely, inviting, best friend Ginnifer West course, you’ll be watched by no less than 20 people (as the tee off for the North course is NEXT to you), but looking at the HUGE fairway on the opening par 5 will make you feel a whole lot better…and we did, with each of us stripping down the fairway and strutting to our buggies like we were pros. Obviously, we all descended into the duffing, topping and whiffing hackers we all are in reality after that. But hey, first tee jitters: BEGONE!

The second hole is an inviting straight par 4, which after a good drive, I was set up with an 8 that I proceeded to duff. 3 on, 3 putted and back to life, back to reality of Golf Hacking.

The par 4 third is a really very picturesque hole, with water on the left of the green, and a grand view over the next hole, which has an intimidating tee shot for hookers. Thankfully I have seemed to graduate from a hooker on my misses to a slicer…which might seem like a strange progress, but it’s true what they say, you can talk to a fade but not to a draw, meaning, slice misses seems a little better for me in keeping the ball in play. I mean, have you ever duck hooked before? It doesn’t stand a chance, it just goes 50 meters or so and skitters into a drink or kills someone in the next flight. A banana slice miss at least goes further and higher, and at least you can align yourself for that miss. It probably makes no sense, but nothing much in my golf game makes sense.

At this point, after starting with a par, I have proceeded to make a mess of my irons and my putts to double bogey 3 holes, before sorting out with a bogey on the par 5 5th, a narrow tee shot that opens up considerably after that. It’s surrounded with forest so, as usual, keep the dang ball on the fairway and you’ll manage this.

The par 3 8th (like the one on southern) is probably the best looking hole for us. It’s a short par 3 at 130 meters, with water on the left, and an elevated tee shot. I didn’t take a picture because a phone call came, but trust me, it’s still an intimidating 130 meters to the green.

The last hole, like Southerm requires you to blast past the water to the dogleg right, elevated green, which makes it awesomely hard to reach in two. But it passed what we call ‘Last Hole Test’, which is to make sure the final hole doesn’t resemble the underside of a toilet seat (such as Harvard’s final hole), so people leave with good impression. Staffield West is a must play.

Why I Sucked

Putts. It doesn’t look like I had too many 3 putts, but I made a lot of good chips that stopped within 3-5 feet of the hole. I missed, I think 3 3 footers, and 2 more within 4-5 feet. Putts I should be making in my sleep just didn’t fall.Plus the greens were devilish. Not bad, but difficult, for some reason. The speed was quick on the first few holes, and then it slowed down considerably, causing us to putt like lizards on cocaine.

IRONS. Especially my stupid pitching wedge, 9 iron and 8 iron. These are scoring irons, the bread and butter of golfers. And I managed to play HORRENDOUS with them. Two GIRs means CRAP irons. While my driver was working overtime, my iron days was best summed up on the easy hole 14. I had about 110 meters left to the green. An easy pitching wedge in hand and I completely whiffed it into bunker. 15th, same, easy fairway 9 iron big pull to the left and a duff chip caused my double bogey. And hole 16, an easy pitching wedge again push right. I don’t get it…this never happens on the range, where I can hit 6/10 times the driving range green and come here to play like a Phillipino Tarsier being jabbed with morphine.

Not So Sucked

If there was a positive, driver would be it. I drove very well overall, except for a few bad ones here and there, but still managed to escape those due to the generosity and welcoming nature of Ginnifer Staffield. My driver distance has been shortened due to my insistence on playing for a fade instead of draw, so that my misses are slices instead of hooks (read above for a full dissertation of this amazing strategy), but I’m getting it more in play, and I am SURE sooner or later, when my putting, driver, irons and short game come together, I will be able to pull of a 39 on a 9 hole like I did in Harvard. Some day.

What to Work On

I am almost this close to giving up practicing on the range, and save up my money to buy an iphone or something. It’s quite useless to play so well on range and hack around like a grave digger when it actually matters. I was fortunate to be playing on a Ginnifer course today….if I brought this game to a discarded banana skin course like Bukit Beruntung, I would have shot like 10 strokes worse.

Gilanalysis 14: Bukit Kemuning

Handicap:20

Gross: 87

Net: 67

Verdict: Second sub 90 round of the year!

What Happened

I was actually feeling better about my swing since practicing a bit after the embarrassment at Templers. And Bukit Kemuning, famous for its runway, huge fairways seems like a course that would allow us to boost a little self esteem. Also, Bukit Kemuning is flat as…a runway…..I refrain from the obvious simile that most men are familiar with, because this is a family friendly golf blog.

Anyways, we all know Bukit Kemuning completely sucks in terms of service, and that hasn’t change one bit. Registering for the round too nearly as long as having a colonscopy done on you, and when you got to the course, they gave us a caddie who halfway had to run off to take a dump; and couldn’t find any balls, and always stuck to the guy on the fairway. Grr. Also, Bukit Kemuning is expensive. Even with a voucher we forked out close to RM90 due to the stupid “forced caddy” policy, and this is for a course that should cost RM50 for the weekday. It’s not a very good course, to be honest. There’s really nothing nice about it, fairways are bare, no elevation, no undulation on the green…you could possibly play yourself into a coma on this course….but they still cut your throat while you’re in coma.

Anyways, I played pretty well; at one point, going +2 over eight holes with 5 pars, 1 birdie. This is mainly due to a LOT OF BAILOUT courtesy of Bukit Kemuning’s fairways. If I were to play in Seri Selangor, I would have OB’ed 3-4 times with hooks and slices. Six greens in regulations also was a record high for me, but my putter was really up and down today. Basically, yet another tale of missed opportunities.

We all think Bukit Kemuning has generous fairways, but I still only managed to hit 4 fairways, which shows our skills deliberately balances itself to its own crappy nature when playing on ‘easier’ courses….and the course is deceivingly long, so it ain’t as easy as you think!

My 87 was good though, but due to the retarded nature of golf wagers; I ended up losing the most moolahs. Go figure. The other three shot 94,95 and 104 respectively and I lost the most – 5 balls to them. We played the 3-1-1 format for sixers, hence the incredible possibility of being the best player and winding up the biggest loser. AIYA.

Why I Sucked

Putter was completely broke in some holes including missing 3 footers at hole 3, 11, 15 and 16. Drivers, while it doesn’t look like it was also a bit out, but not too much, except for the final hole where I drove a great drive, flew over the fairway and into the small little hazard drain. A good thwack with my hybrid allowed me to salvage a bogey, but I was fuming mad at the course that penalises good hits.

Not So Sucked

As bad as I putted, I still managed two significant bombs. First, a 10 footer to save par on the on the 12th, and right after that, a 30 footer across the green for a birdie on the 13th. But except for a semi shank with my nine on the 10th, my irons were working well. Take that, stupid 8-iron that shanked in my eagle attempt in Bangi….I hold grudges a lot on my irons.

What to Work On

To be fair, I was experimenting yet again with my putter, using my blade. Who’s to say with my mallet I might have putter better? But driver is still WIP, and my play around the greens are absolutely clownish. I.e stick me 30 feet in, and it’s like having a tapir on a tightrope 90 feet in the air. Without a safety net. And hunters shooting at it. While eating a banana. That’s how tense I am.

Gilanalysis 13: Bangi 1 and 2

Handicap:20

Gross: 94

Net: 74

Verdict: It really was better than it looks…

What Happened

After the nightmare at Templer, it’s always a great welcome to play at Bangi 1 + 2 (Kajang and Putrajaya). It’s like coming home, because Bangi is really one of the all time favourite course. Yet, I started playing like a twit with 2 triple bogeys. It wasn’t that bad, a snap hook at the first and I was behind the green in 3. However, a stupid duffed chip, 5 on and a 2 putt started me off. 2nd was a great 9 iron in but caught the lip of the bunker and rolled to a very bad spot. Took two to get out and three putted!

Hit a great drive on 3, leaving 150 to the par 5, and a six iron on the green. And again, my first putt blasted past and my birdie turned away, 3 putt again! Aiyo. 5th and 6th could have been pars, a skulled 60 degree 3rd shot messed the 5th, and my 2nd on the 6th was literally one metre away from the green and rolling near the hole. Instead it hung up on the bunker face. 7th is always a do or die for me. I OBed my driver being extremely aggressive.

My worst hole was the 9th. I hit the best drive ever. Ever. I was 140m downhill on a Par 5 looking at an eagle. Guess what. 8-iron SHANK. As in I shanked the heck out of it and nearly murdered my friend, OB. AUGHH. Fourth to the front, bad chip two putt. My front nine could have been 3-4 shots better, but there you have it.

Back nine was a blitz until messing up my 8-iron AGAIN on the 14th and a pull on the 15th. Sandy par on 16th was my final highlight. The last two holes were all survival mode after pull hooks with my driver. Bogey free back nine. Good eh?

Why I Sucked

Anyone interested in a loose 8-iron? As in, what do I do with my 8? Shanked it at my eagle approach. Duffed it on 14th to mess my 4-par momentum. My 60 degree wasn’t very kind as well, and putting struggled all the way. I never could get used to Bangi greens. I like it but somehow I always get messed up by the speed. Driver began hooking at the end, but no, I liked my driver this round.

Not So Sucked

Driver finally worked. Except for the 1st, 7th and 18th pull hooks, the rest were dead on. Alignments gave me issues on 15th and 18th but overall, especially on the front nine 3 par 5s, smoked it straight and long. Finally, good boy, Mr Driver.

What to Work On

Missed opportunities due to some absolutely ridiculously lousy iron play. More positives than negatives though, as soon as I sell my 8-iron, I think I can probably go pro.

By the way, as I write this, I just watched Tiger miss a 3 foot for eagle. He has literally dropped 3 shots in the back nine. So kan-cheong one la.