Posted on

Golf is truly a strange game — Again

kotapermaioctober

A few posts back, I made a noise about how golf is so strange – that even hitting like 10 GIR, I can still manage to 3-putt 6 of these greens in regulation, and I threw away my putter – literally up in the air. Because I am so cheap, I had to go collect it back.

Kota Permai is a really nice course to play in. The holes are challenging, the par 3s are memorable and the course setup is tricky and the two ending holes are worthy adversaries. However, breaking 90 hasn’t been easy for me there. I played 89-94-90 in my previous 3 outings there and it didn’t really start that great for me this round, after hooking my first drive into the woods and the second one as well. My first par came on the 14th, my favourite par 3, which is elevated, and usually require a strong pitching wedge to clear the front greens. I hit my shot to around 6 feet. Unfortunately, two of the other players we were teaming up against both slamdunked their shots – one of them to about 3 feet, and another actually hit the flagpole before bouncing 5 feet off. Both of them birdied.

From there, I sort of struggled abit until the last par 5 where I putted in a 15 footer, followed by the next par 5 on the front 9, where I putted in another 10 footer.

I was actually hitting my irons excellent but my drives kept blocking right, causing triple and doubles to start appearing on my card. I three putted 3 of my greens in regulation, so my scores should have been a lot better, but nothing beats the final. I hit my only second fairway with a good drive (my second good drive only actually), and then with a seven iron, completely top the crap out of my ball, causing it to launch low and skim over the fairway and luckily onto the green. When I approached the uphill green, someone from the practice green said, “WAH, that’s  damn good shot!”

I looked and saw my ball nestling 4 inches from the hole – from arguably my worst iron approach shot of the day.

Golf is a funny game indeed – sometimes, the good is not rewarded, and the bad goes unpunished. Kind of like our country, I think!

Posted on

The Case for and against Australia migration Final Part

Here’s the final piece of my rant before we go back to proper golf articles

Leisure and social interactions

I am assuming this means whether there is time and whether there are options for leisurely pursuit and social interactions with friends etc. This is quite subjective as you might think immediately in Australia it would be better. However, if you look at it from an immigrant stand point, it’s a different story. You are literally uprooting and restarting over there. Most of my peers (and I have MANY peers) who decided to go there, all speak of the same story – their entire world becomes smaller and more focused on their own family. Of course, there are some exceptions, but for sure mostly social interactions become much less for first generation immigrants. The OZs look with unease, and we end up sending our kids to a 90% Asian school. Integration is difficult due to our natural Asian tendency to flock with people the same hair colour. Importantly, family. Because of how we are, our extended family becomes critical – our grandmother, our parents all play a part in bringing up kids. We go for dinner, lunches etc. Then there is social groups – golf groups, football groups, mamak groups – in general because we grew up here, social interactions are obviously more abundant.

On leisure – again, its a matter of time and money. The myth in Australia is that you will have a lot of time. But your money doesn’t go that far as well, and shops closes at 6 pm. A good friend of mine said he had to completely revamp his outlook – he now go to bed at around 9 pm and wakes up at 5 am to go for a jog. He watches his beloved Liverpool in his house on his own because the matches are so late there, and he looks smatteringly miserable. Of course, to each its own – so it’s a touch and go for leisure for both countries, but Malaysia still wins it for social interaction.

Score: Malaysia 3 – 2 Australia

Economic and physical safety

The great misfortune of Malaysia is this: We could have been a better Singapore. Yes, our dear cousins down south who generally thumb down on us most of the time despite the fact that most of Singaporeans these days are immigrants from Malaysia as well. If we could have combined the sensibility and order of Singapore with the rich culture, resources and general character of Malaysia, we would have been better than Switzerland and our Ringgit would be referred to as better than the Sterling, as opposed now, where the ringgit is used in some countries such as Germany and America as wrapping paper or toilet paper. So sad. The frustration is this: If Malaysia was a country pockmarked by volcanoes, or constantly destroyed by earthquakes, or is blitzed continuously by asteroids, then no one would blame us for the stupid economic situation we are in. The fact is, pound for pound, acre for acre, we are literally the RICHEST country in the world with oil, logging, palm, rubber, natural ocean resources, farms, natural mountains and great golf courses. If we wanted to, we would have those poor Americans and UK people flocking to Malaysia to get into this amazing country.

Alas – like a pretty girl constantly abused by her crazy boyfriends, but yet having the need to be with these crazy boyfriends, our country is compounded with the stupidest politicians found in the entire world, who constantly take advantage of the country, rape its resources and compare Malaysia to countries like Cambodia who had 1/3 of is generation killed in the 70s, instead of comparing ourselves to Switzerland, USA or UK. SO individuals become bamboozling rich, while the country suffers generations after generations.

As for physical safety, the only place in Malaysia where you are theoretically safe is in your locked home, in a safe room, and putting yourself into a giant safe, locked by a combination with 1000 random numbers. No, safety is not a concept in Malaysia. That’s why when I was in Australia, I see Malaysians habitually threatening their children that if they do not stay with the parents closely in the mall, they will be kidnapped, and have their hands chopped off and become beggars in Thailand. Hey – we all grew up with that threat from our beloved grandmothers.

Score: Malaysia 3 – 3 Australia

Governance and basic rights

I don’t think I even need to go into this. Our country is the only country in the world where the suspect can also become the investigator, who can also fire other investigators and put his other suspect companions to become his own investigators and if all else fails, they are put in prison for some obscure reason like homosexuality. Ah yes, Malaysia. Our politicians are being seriously studied now by environmentalist as a possible evolutionary step of the dodo bird, which mysteriously disappeared last century.

However, contrary to popular belief that politicians are only stupid in Malaysia, politicians, by and large are stupid in a regional sense – take that fellow Jusuf Kalla from Indonesia for instance – the fler that said we should be thankful that Indonesia gives us 11 months of clean air – it just proves that stupidity is so global these days.

Score: Malaysia 3 – 4 Australia
Natural and living environment

I am just going to interpret this as how much quality the environment is in both countries. I would say, hands down, Malaysia would be way better than Australia for Nature. Sorry, I am biased. Living environment, I am just going to classify it as food. Food is definitely better in Malaysia, a hundred times. Yes, some people say in Melbourne you can get Malaysian food etc. While I do concede the food source is better like beef, pork, poultry etc and quality of food is better, but nasi lemak? Char Kueh Teow? Banana Leaf? Come on. Seriously. Australia? If you are into croc meat or wallaby meat, give me my claypot chicken rice anytime.

Score: Malaysia 4 – 4 Australia

Overall experience of life

So overall – based on Gilagolf extensive research – it’s really no big advantage to go to Australia at all – or in another sense, no big disadvantage. If you are pretty well off here, and you are past 35 and you already have 2 kids or more; generally I would say, Malaysia is a great option to stay. If we can sort ourselves out politically, this would be the greatest country in the entire world. If you are younger, no family and want to start at the bottom, with not much ambition but like security; then by all means, go for the immigrant route – our grandfathers did it, and now I suppose it’s our generations’ turn.

Posted on

The Case for and against Australia migration Part Two

Without much ado in comparing Australia and Malaysia and to either bust or confirm the myth that Australia is a dreamworld that all Malaysians born aspire to run off to, here’s a breakdown of the Quality of Life Index published by the EU. Before anyone crucifies me, though, do note that this is written in Gilagolf typical fashion – absolutely no research, and the opinions are generally very myopic, and should be consumed only for fun.

Material living conditions (income, consumption and material conditions)
Productive or main activity
Health
Education
Leisure and social interactions
Economic and physical safety
Governance and basic rights
Natural and living environment
Overall experience of life

I obviously got this list from the website and I am too lazy to click and read the actual definitions, so I’ll just interpret it on my own.

Material living conditions (income, consumption and material conditions)

This speaks for itself. I am thinking this is like how much people earn, and if good jobs are there etc.

Now I am not comparing Malaysians vs Australians. Note that I am comparing Malaysians vs Malaysians-who-are-first-generation-imigrants-to-Australia, the same way my grandfather was comparing his life after he was dumped by his father from the boat to Malaysia, with the China he just fled from. Which had a lot of killings, I assume.

Anyway, the myth in Australia is this: Malaysians who go to Australia will strike it rich and they all go and start a Mamak shop or chinese restaurant and live happily ever after.

The honest truth is that, except for a small handful, most Malaysians going to Australia are going to find it tough to land a job. A chief marketing officer I know headed there with his family and after 8 months, had to become a water bottle sales man door to door. A training director I know is now working as a secretary to a dentist. A high flying lawyer left the high life here and is now selling ice-cream. I know a guy who had a very good pay at pharma line and is now a year into migration and without a job. He is thinking of being a tram driver, but no, I will bet they won’t have anybody doing public service without prior work experience in Australia. Or another guy who used to own his own restaurant here, he is now a contract insurance agent. I mean, the expectations need to be tempered down significantly. As my friend who went over there would say, “Yes, training is good business in Malaysia, and probably can be here in Australia. But in Malaysia, would you want to be trained in corporate strategy by a Bangladeshi worker?” Not that we have anything against Bangladeshis, but honestly, that’s probably how immigrants are perceived over in Oz. No offence.

So you see, you might think Australia is X3 now to the ringgit. But you must also realise, your income will be likely around 30% of what you are getting now. So if you get 20K per month here, you will be lucky to earn 6K AUD. And after the tax and all, you will surprise at how many cornflakes meals (they are cheap in OZ!) you will be having at home.

So Quality of life in this aspect is very much biased in their advertisement of Australia. Now, of course for your kids, they have a better shot at jobs than you. But we are comparing immigrants to Malaysians who prefer to stay in Malaysia, remember.

Score: Malaysia 1 – 0 Australia

Productive or main activity

No idea what is this about. I will just imagine how productive your life is in terms of job satisfaction etc.

Now, EVERYONE swears that they would love a life with a 9 – 5 sort of schedule. They have no idea what another way of working is.

Australia is blessed with a workforce who are not greedy. Really. Their profit is not monetary. It’s TIME. They prefer to knock off earlier and not make the extra buck or deal. I had a colleague who instead of opting to meet me to discuss possible deal scenarios at 4.30 pm in Gold Coast, said, “Sorry, mate, the surf is up, I gotta go!”. It was 3 pm. What?

It’s a great life – for Australians. But wait, what about immigrants? Many of us will fail to adapt to this nonsensical lifestyle of going to work on time and leaving work on time. In fact, many of us modern tech guys will fail miserably at doing anything on a 9 – 5 schedule. The 9 – 5 schedule was created during the industrial revolution, when workers needed to be in the factory line at certain time or stuff doesn’t get done. This stupid idea had been carried on by equally stupid employers in this electronic age thinking this is the way to do things. Many years from now, our kids will be studying this 9 – 5 concept and linking it back to how humans generally began to exhibit similar intelligence to that of a wombat. We all have our own internal clock to get things done.

For Malaysians – more and more people are preferring, not flexi-time, or 9-5 time, they are preferring integrated worklife. That means, you are IN CHARGE of your work. Read the book “Why work sucks and How to fix it” by Cali Ressler and you will get this point. Integrated worklife means, if I have to send my kids or pick them up from school, I do it. I don’t take ‘leave’ or crap shoot because it takes me a few hours, and I am integrating it to my worklife. I am contactable, I am closing deals, I am managing my meetings. Same thing if I want to go shopping with my son for his christmas gift on a slow afternoon. I care about results, and the happier I am with my family and my own time, the more I would want to get the results needed, to keep that happiness.

Immigrants might find this concept a lot harder to accept in Australia. Australia might give Australians this flexibility, but can you imagine you, at the bottom of the food chain, telling your boss, sorry, bro, gotta pick up my daughter now, and will work from home. Call me-lah if anything, ok?!

Score: Malaysia 2 – 0 Australia

Health

I assume this is healthcare. Not health in general. If health in general, I think it’s hard to say. You would think australians are a lot healthier, but you know, it’s touch and go right. The air in Malaysia sucks big time. But the pollen in Australia literally gets me sick all the time. The food in Malaysia is oily, but Australia’s fish and chips isn’t the healthiest either. The general cleanliness in Malaysia is horrible, but ok – in Australia, you get skin cancer faster (note to golfers).

But healthcare. OK – some say Australia has completely free healthcare for immigrants. Um, no. But Medicare still rocks. You get the best public healthcare probably in the world and your medicine is also subsidised (not free). Compared to Malaysia where we can opt for government hospital which are cheap and the chance of you dying in the queue is around 95% since it takes a few weeks for you to get your turn. In some cases, babies had been delivered while the mother is at the waiting room, and other cases, these babies had grown up and graduated as well by the time the counter person called the number of the mother. The second option for Malaysia is private. Private hospitals are all run by companies run by persons who actually would rather watch their own mother die than to provide free healthcare. Private hospitals in Malaysia are notorious in overcharging patients for any small detail and their main motto is to extricate every ounce of money from you before you kick the bucket, which you likely will, mostly after seeing the bill. In fact, it is a known fact that the vending machines there only accept RM50 bills or bigger, else you useless, poor and money-less patients don’t get your Maggi in a cup. Damn, someone has gotta foot the bills of those Maggis!!

So for sure, Australia, hands down is way better. And this alone tips the scale for 99% of the immigrants. I mean, Australia doesn’t discriminate much whether you are an immigrant or not.

Score: Malaysia 2 – 1 Australia

Education

Unfortunately for Malaysia, our so called education has descended to the standards of how gebrils were educated in the middle ages to gnaw away at human remains in the Tower of London. That is to say, the education system in Malaysia is often used as a punchline in jokes, and equated to a bucket of sh*t, festering in a cesspool of sh*t, which happens to also be located in a quagmire of sh*t. Our minister of education can probably string a few words together to describe his day in English, but has been known to simply mutter incomprehensibly in another language of how useless English is in this world and that only the people from the isles of England speaks it. When asked to explain, he defended his statement by declaring in broken English, “Why don’t people complain that we do not teach American language, Australian language also? Or even Canadian language, or New Zealand language? Ha?! Why only English? This is obvious way to Anglicise our children!” When corrected that these were all English speaking nations, he chastised the reporter, “I heard of New Zealand language, please. I watched a documentary, where the teacher with the white beard and pointy hat was talking to those beautiful, long haired, pointy ears students with bow and arrows. Pfft.”

I don’t even need to compare the ridiculously and enchantingly free education for PR or citizens in Australia. In Malaysia, we have to paid bucket loads of money for private or ‘international’ education.

Score: Malaysia 2 – 2 Australia

OK – halftime. Not bad, at least we are tied!

Posted on

The Case for and against Australia migration Part One

As I am sitting here typing this – I am wondering: How in God’s green earth is my body able to stay healthy in the choking haze in Malaysia and the moment I come to Melbourne, Australia with its clean air and great weather – I fall sick?

Have we Malaysians evolved to be like cockroaches, so used to dirt and filth that our bodies no longer can handle cleanliness and it just goes into panic mode the moment it cannot breathe in poisonous air?

Or is the weather in Australia overrated, or in some essence the entire concept of migrating to Australia a flawed and overrated one?

I’ve spoken to many good friends here who had uprooted and migrated to Australia and every one of them swear that the migration was the best thing ever and leaving behind Malaysia was the greatest decision they ever made and anyone living back in Malaysia are definitely in trouble. Some compare Malaysia to what China was in terms of the Chinese Civil War that caused a lot of our grandpapas to come in boats to Malaysia to escape the communists. In fact, my grandfather was dumped here when he was around 10 by his father, who immediately took the same boat to go back to China.

I always wondered why Malaysian chinese would still hold on to the ideal that China is their country and become so proud to be called ‘Chinese’, when the only association they have with China are the toys they buy for their kids.

Anyway – back to these Australian immigrants – sometimes, they are so happy that they are in the land of milk and honey that they try to convince everyone else to leave Malaysia and start their own settlement in Australia – as first gen immigrants and the usual reason is “Do it for your kids”, as if staying in Malaysia would cause our kids to turn into slaves and barbaric cannibals.

So I decided to do a series of Australian Migration articles on why its good or bad.

Am I an authority in this? Well, I studied in Australia for 2 years and lived in Australia. I’ve been to every Australian large city (except for Adelaide), and mostly, I was a signature away from being a PR. Yes, a couple of years back, I actually went through the entire process of getting PR in Australia – I paid a total of around RM12,000 ( a lot for a guy who only earned around 3,800RM that time per month) to the lawyer and went through quite a lot, up to the english test and according to the lawyer, I just had to submit in one final form and she guaranteed success. She desperately chased me for it and I told her, I chickened out. She said the 12K was non-refundable but if I decided to take up the PR again, she will give me a discount on future fees.

I never spoke to her again and lapsed my application. And lost 12K.

People thought I was stupid and retarded. But to me, I just wasn’t ready. I wasn’t ready to let go of this country called Malaysia. People say, you don’t need to – you can put a foot in here and there and just glide around and get PR for your kids. But there are certain obligations like going to Australia and living there for 2 out of 5 years blah blah etc. I didn’t even love Australia the way my other peers did. I was ok and contented staying there – I generally don’t have too much emotion on where I stay, I can adapt to US and India if needed; but I didn’t love or hate Australia at all – it was just ‘meh’ on my end.

So how the hell is this related to golf?

It’s not, it’s just verbal vomit on my end because I am wondering what so great about Australia when I have a stuffed nose and generally a bad headache from my sinus and having a great cup of coffee next to me. It’s just the good and bad of Australia.

For the next post, I will break down the measurements of quality of life, Gilagolf metrics and judge for ourselves whether Australia is better than Malaysia in all the aspects that is important.

Posted on

Birdie Run Ends

I didn’t want to jinx it so I didn’t mention it.

But I was on a birdie run which ended last week.

For 5 games, I had at least one birdie. My birdie run stood at six when my luck ran out in Sungai Long. Although I cracked 90, I missed a lot of putts, including a 6 footer for birdie on the 10th.

So far, I’m pretty ok this year, I am averaging around 0.44 birdie, meaning, around 1 birdie in 2.3 games or so. That means birdies aren’t that rare anymore. Which means my irons are generally getting better, because it sure aint my stupid putter.

Anyways, I am going to be taking a longish break – around 3 weeks or so without golf – partly due to the haze, but mainly due to travelling, so won’t be updating in a while, unless Tiger Woods hits the news again.

Happy Hacking, Gilagolfers!