Friday, March 12th, 2010...8:54 am
Why Malaysians Suck at Golf
After watching yet another edition of the Malaysian Open fade away, with our Malaysian golfers further away from winning one, the only bright spot this week was that our great yellow hope, Danny Chia is going to St Andrews…again. I believe this is the third British Open for Mr Chia, and all I can say is: Please make the cut.
I mean, why is Malaysia so slow in producing champions? Look at India. You’ve got folks like Jyothi, Arjun, Jeev. Thailand, you’ve got so many world class golfers with unpronouncable names. We’ve got a Malaysian Open year in, year out and yet the best we can do is tied 60th, for US5k each. US5k! That’s like Tiger Woods spending on toilet paper every day!
Observing this phenomenon and through through study (consisting of lounging around the range drinking teh tarik and commenting about people’s swings), the conclusion is we probably lack good coaches. Serious. If you are a coach reading this, I’m sure you are a good one, but you’re likely the minority.
I remember my first coach, this dude in Bandar Utama driving range. I was just picking up golf then and I paid him like for 6 lessons or something…I think about RM500 or something. He was a pretty good sales guy, telling me I have a good swing, that I’ll be wasting my talent and the world will not see a greater champion than me…basically sold me out right away that if I didn’t dedicate myself to a lifelong pursuit of golf excellence, I am committing the gravest sin of all time and I should be fried alive on a stake.
So there’s the con. I paid him RM500 for 6 lessons.
Newbies: NEVER PAY ANYTHING TO ANYONE UNTIL YOU KNOW HE’S FOR REAL!
I.e do a POC (Proof of concept). Pay him for one lesson first, see if he can properly fix you up. If he doesn’t allow that, tell him to eat bananas (the chinese way of saying it sounds so much cruder) and take your business elsewhere. Any coach that doesn’t allow a one time tryout session is probably a coach with so low confidence in himself, he’s not worth your time. And they will try this trick: “Oh, I need 5 lessons with you before you see a difference.”
No, that’s because they suck and they want your money. If a coach can’t tell what’s your problem in the first hour and how to fix it and at least show he can fix it, he’s a twit.
So back to my BU range. I paid this dude off, and first lesson he was all very attentive. He thought me a few drills and I was reasonably happy with the results. Second lesson, he teaches me about the same thing, mutters about me needing to improve. Then leaves me for half the session for me to ‘test his new technique’. What?
Can you imagine paying for a doctor who charges you for consultation by the hour and ask you to take his medicine, and then waits for an hour for it to take effect? Who pays for that hour while he’s lounging around doing crap? So this golf coach, while I was ‘testing’ my new techniques, he goes off to teach another guy. WHAT?
Hey, fatso, I blocked you for an hour. You are mine. You don’t go whore yourself to another student and charge him for that same hour. That’s service fraud.
And that wasn’t the worse.
I skipped a couple of weeks due to traveling. I arranged my third lesson with him and when I arrived, guess what? He didn’t know who I was. He was like, “Who you?” I am like, “Your student, you pimp.” “Oh yeah….ok, umm, show me your swing.”
WHAT?!!?
I show him my swing, and he lets me do the same drill as I did in day ONE!!!!!! WHAT THE H*LL!!!!!!!!
I asked him, “Don’t you have any records of my improvement?”
He smiles and says he does, but that I was rusty. Well, jolly good, because you don’t even know who the heck I was, how can you tell that I am rusty?
I asked him to refund me, he says no. I told him to at least arrange me a free round at the nine hole golf course. He says he can’t. I asked him if I may stuff my 7 iron up his bunny hole and he stares at me, annoyed.
So thus ended my unfortunate encounter with my first golf coach. Subsequently I tied up with this Australian from Tropicana range and in the first lesson (free), he gave me a detailed computer analysis of my swing. Talk about ozzie service, mate. I took up one lesson (RM100) under him, started playing some of the best golf of my life, then went back to him for another lesson and fixed a few swing flaws and then tried to have another lesson and he was gone. Went back to Australia probably. He was a great coach.
I generally don’t like to blame people for playing sucky golf, but I really wish I did stuff my 7-iron up my first coach’s bunny hole. Dang him for producing my mutated golf swing!
8 Comments
March 13th, 2010 at 3:06 am
hi..is the coach’s name robert??? im supposed to be learning there. but i will becareful if he is the one…
March 13th, 2010 at 7:24 am
In this country, most pro golfers do not have sufficient knowledge of a proper sports diet. They always play well the first few days but wither in the final day.
eg.
” The carbohydrate connection
Carbohydrate is a crucial fuel for exercise. The body makes its own carbohydrate store, known as glycogen, which is stashed away in the liver and muscles. Glycogen is the body’s fuel of choice for any exercise more intense than a gentle jog. This is because it can be broken down to provide energy more quickly than fat (the body’s other major energy store). However, the snag with glycogen is that only limited amounts of it can be stored. This means that regular training, as well as competition where activity is at least an hour long, carries the risk of glycogen depletion. Low glycogen stores will mean a more sluggish performance and an increased risk of injury.”
(from the sports diet newsletter)
March 13th, 2010 at 11:22 am
Well, I don’t want to take away anyone’s rice bowl, so all I have to say is this: if the coach doesn’t have any proper methods to feedback to you on your swing, i.e via video and a software that tracks if your swing is too flat, too narrow etc; then look elsewhere. I am a big believer of feedback. And also that a coach cannot tell the problem unless it takes you frame by frame. The only way you are going to learn anything is for you to understand what in the heck is wrong with you.
I’d recommend Trops, I think they have computer aided training there. Or Bukit Kiara is good too. I think BU range has probably the same amount of technology as my grandfather’s rubber estate, so buyer beware. Why not just ask for a test lesson first? Also, try to observe how he teaches the other students. Does he give full attention? Or is he a golf instructor whore (i.e cram a few students in an hour)? Even if the student is trying out a new technique, a good coach will never talk on his mobile, or talk to someone else, or talk to his pal etc. If he doesn’t respect his students, he’s likely a bum. Talk to his other students, get some feedback, see if they have improved etc. Good luck and welcome to the lifelong suffering of GOLF.
March 13th, 2010 at 12:20 pm
Yeah, agree with GG there….ALWAYS get a trial hour first and gauge the pro…and I also agree that the NUMERO UNO ill that plagues this country’s golf is lack of proper stewardship, lack of good pro’s AND The Great Malaysian Mentality (read : jaguh kampung, tidak apa attitude )….Did you guys even see Danny’s fark face and body language after he hits a bad shot ??? He acts like the world came crashing down on him ! Eh hello blader, you are a plo, leh !!! You do NOTHING but play, practice, eat, sleep and crap golf…unlike us weekend warriors who have jobs, wives, ex-wives, kids, mortgages, lousy bosses, etc…and play as and when we can, and practice EVEN less !!
Grow up la…before Malaysian Open itself, already saying putting problem la, not hitting irons properly la, aiyooo…ennadaaa macha !!!
Break away from the mentality, think you are winner, you WILL become one..!
YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK…err…or something to that effect…
Anyway, you qualified for the Open…good job…but make the cut la bro…and any golfer worth his wedge will tell you that you need experience to handle a links course….think any Ahmad, Muthu, or Ah Beng can just walk up St Andy’s and actually play the damned course???
But all said and done..I am a patriot…if Danny is in the same flight as Tiger (and I am a HUGE tiger fan ), I will still support my kampung boy all the way !!!!
So Danny….go get ‘em !!!!
March 16th, 2010 at 10:05 am
I have had a few coaches in other countries that commented the following when a nervous beginner standing there for his new classes: “Ahhhh, that is not good!!”, “Can not do like that!!!”, “That was a bad shot!”
Talk about boosting the self confidence in a player, NOT!
I came across a guy from Marocco that was earlier teaching at KLGCC, now he is at Tropicana. And man, is he good or what!!! Computer analysis, tell you to continue to slice and shank the the ball, hit the bad shots (as u think they are) and in the end he helps you to improve by analysing your pattern. Active and not like other coaches, that talk on handphone and want u to hit as many balls as possible during one hour. This man I have recommended to a lot of expats in KL and locals and he is VERY good and have reduced my hcp quite a bit. He also takes you out for course management….
March 17th, 2010 at 2:55 pm
I know what you mean, I’ve had my fair share of idiotic coaches in this country. But Trops guys seem to know what they are doing, and the computer analysis really help also. Kudos to them!
March 29th, 2010 at 4:00 am
robert in BU looks like a sleaze
April 19th, 2010 at 12:44 am
I had one in Subang Racquet. I didnt finish the lesson as I found that I progressed more by watching youtube
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