Golf's GOAT

The chairman of Nike has dismissed Tiger Woods affairs as a 'minor blip'

Every once in a while, sports will churn up a champion that is beyond reason, sparking off the time honored discussion of the GOAT, the Greatest Of All Time. For Tennis, there is Federer and Sampras. For football, Pele and Maradona. For basketball, Jordan and Bird. For ping-pong, Hang Tze Hwa and Vasily Zilokavaey. I made the last two up but they sound really legendary.

For golf, we have on one side the guy holding 18 majors, a family man and an upright citizen. On the other side, we have a philandering guy holding 14 majors, with the potential to win 30 but for his recent fall from grace where his sex mistresses are currently at 13, one less than his majors. Well, 14 if you plus his model wife.

Tiger, tiger, tiger.

Instead of harping on the obvious (that it is not nice to sleep with so many women for health and spiritual reasons), Gilagolf will put it in perspective.

Tiger plays golf.

He’s still a great golfer.

Which begs the question, with his stock dropping, smart sponsors should and must go in now! Imagine if we bought citibank at 90 cents. It’s up to 4 bucks now!! Tiger’s value is crashing like GM, but given the fickleness of America and his obvious greatness in golf and the very fact that you have a name TIGER; people like Tag, AT&T, Gatorade must be crazy to be ‘reconsidering’ their sponsorship deals.

And Accenture, i.e consultants, i,e people who have no idea what the baloozas is happening anywhere (I know since I’m one of ’em), actually DROPPED Tiger and abandoned him at his darkest hour. On the other extreme, I like Nike the best, when the chairman says this:

“When his career is over, you’ll look back on these indiscretions as a minor blip, but the media is making a big deal out of it right now.”

Um, no, Mr Chairman, you dumb nut. What Tiger did was not a MINOR BLIP. It just shows how immoral Nike is and how absolutely chauvinistic their principles are. YOU SUCK, NIKE! Adidas FOREVER! When you are married and you have sex with 13 other women, that is not a Blip. That is a major, major screwup and Tiger should be whipped 80 times and castrated and all the women in the world go…”Yeah!”

But we still love Tiger because first and foremost, he is the GOAT of golf. No doubt, no second thoughts. He has provided enough inspiration for all of us hackers to actually play this stupid game. It’s a waste of time, money and it gives you skin cancer, but can any of you honestly tell me you got the goosebumps watching old dudes like Palmer and Nicklaus play? Boring. Or young punks like Anthony Kim and Sergio Garcia play? Copycats. Or handsome dudes like Adam Scott and John Daly play? Chokers. Nope, Tiger will and always will be the GOAT of golf, from the day Adam and Eve got booted out of Eden until the day the trumpets sound and rapture comes.

Tiger, if for any strange reason you are reading this article, Gilagolf is willing to be your sponsor. Unfortunately we only have 39.90USD to pay you per year, but seeing how the other sponsors are flying off like chickens, except for the immoral and evil Nike, I’d suggest you think about it. We can print out Gilagolf on your cap if you’d like. We’re serious.

Oh, and just kidding about the castration part. No offense taken, eh?

GilaTwit – Good idea?

I thought it’d be a good idea to set up a gilatweet, so it can be followed at

http://twitter.com/gilagolf

Here’s a nice looking page

Just head over there and click on Follow +

The idea is that I can update on the fly when I head out and play on the course to get the course conditions etc. And if you are playing somewhere, and it sucks bad, we gotta let the whole world know about it. I think you can also update with @gilagolf in the reply column.Ka-POW! Instant power back to the hands of the golfers. Better not let these golf course owners bully us anymore! If they are sanding their dang greens, why should we be tricked into paying the same price??

I’m a first time twit (is that the name to use?), so if there are other gilagolfers who have been twits for a long time or are twits all your life, guide me along.

I’ll only start twitting if there are followers (and who the heck should I follow??), else I’ll be using my precious sens and ringgits on SMSes that doesn’t make a difference.

So is this a good idea?

For sexy reasons, I also bit.ly gilagolf to http://bit.ly/4u02st. I don’t really know where or how to use this, but the sole purpose is to show people that golfers can be semi-intelligent when it comes to technology as well.

A Famosa review coming up!!

Saujana GCC – Palm (Cobra)

Introduction

Our previous review of Saujana had it at 75%, pretty short of the 90% required for the DAGTH (Died and Gone to Heaven) category, which as of now, none of the golf courses in Malaysia have achieved.

And finally, having just stepped foot in Mines Resort, Gilagolf finally came upon one of the elusive courses of all: Palm Course of the Saujana, otherwise known as the COBRA. I’m actually not sure why it’s called the Cobra, I guess because it’s snaky, or poisonous, or slithery, but you know golf commentators, they really suck at nicknames.

So anyways, I was invited there by a good friend of mine, who was a VIP of the club (somehow through my wayside travels, I will chance upon a VIP here and there), and he needed company for a round and was willing to subsidise the green fee, without which, I would most likely have to pawn off my Tag, seeing that that my income has been severely reduced.

Due to the invitation and probably a flight of prestigious character, I had to cut back my photography spree at the risk of being mistaken for paparazzi and chased off the course with a 7-iron. Hence, the pictures here aren’t that great, but it will have to do.

IMG_0622.jpg picture by gilagolf

Travel (5/5)

Aw, you know how to get there. It’s Saujana! Check my previous post here.

Price (3/5)

After complaining so much about the mythical 400RM green fee of Mines (which so far has yet to be disputed), RM280 ain’t so bad for weekday golf (it balloons to RM400 over the weekend). I was heavily subsidized and even with that, I was forking out 3 figures, so you can imagine.

But then again, pricing against the experience of the course. This is the course where Malaysia Open plays, this is where the British Open qualifiers are. In the case of Malaysian courses, this is as prestigious as prestigious gets. Is it worth RM280 green fee? Well, we complain everything is too expensive, but at the end, this is Saujana Cobra. It’s a whole different kettle of fish. Adding buggy fee and insurance, the price would be RM320 or so. Just try not to get a caddy or you’ll end up tipping more.

After going through the course, you know you will only play if its subsidized, or there is a tourney invite….but due to its prestige, it gets a 3/5 for pricing.

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First thoughts

What can you say? Standing at the first tee, I’m just wondering to myself, hey, I’m standing where Anthony Kim stood a couple of months back when he came for the Malaysian Open. Cool.

I’ve gone for golf tournaments before and stood 3 rows deep at the side watching Prom Meesawat rattle his tee shot at the magnificent par 5 18th and wondered, darn, could I have outdrove him? You know Prom, aka the Big Dolphin, right? He’s like this big teddy bear that lumbers around the course and plays like a god. He’s an inspiration to everyone sporting a belly (which is 99.99% of all casual golfers in Malaysia), that to be cool at golf, all you need is a good pair of sunglasses. Go, Prom!

No, but I came close with a 250m drive past the two fairway bunkers. The amazing thing was I still managed to screw up the hole, it’s just amazing.

Service (4/5)

I don’t have much experience with the service since I didn’t use their caddy, it was just our flight. I think it would be unfair to base it on my previous experience with Saujana, so I’m bumping it a +1 from our Bunga Raya review, just because this is the Cobra and we feel like Prom Meesawat, belly and all.

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Fairways(4/5)

Come on, Saujana, you just shot yourself in the foot to attain DAGTH status! Anything less than perfect will screw up your score. Try as I might, I still found the fairways wanting. I mean, it certainly feels ok, but I recall one hole where my drive landed on the fairway and I saw a bit of bald patch on it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still very good, but not as immaculate as say Tropicana when I played on it the other day.

But Saujana is certainly challenging, each hole having its own character, and even the fairways, reminiscent of Rahman Putra, the same way a Maserati resembles a Proton Waja only by the fact that it has four wheels; the fairways are undulating, snaking its way around the former palm oil plantation. In other words, its not just a matter of landing the ball on the fairway, something we seem incapable of doing; it’s also landing where on the fairway.

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Greens (4/5)

Again, a little disappointed with the greens in Saujana. We played on very slow greens, it was almost as if it wasn’t pressed and at one time it was so frustrating, to see your ball rolling to the hole only for it to careen off target by a little bump near the hole. As far as the condition of the greens, I’d say it wasn’t its best, so it loses a divot here.

But ah, the challenge of the greens. It’s absolutely fascinating to watch your ball go through several breaks and dip down a slope so fast, a slight touch is enough to send the ball to the outer limits of the fringe. Saujana greens are devilish, and requires the utmost precision to play. I three putted several holes and finally resorted to landing short and just chip and putt.

IMG_0623.jpg picture by gilagolf

Rough (5/5)

Ah, now we’re talking. The rough, as Saujana rough goes are the toughest. The grass catches your club, snagging it and making your seven iron look like a piece of stubby wood. It’s punishable by death. I am overlooking the slight wetness of the bunkers due to rain the day before, because it still played well.

Case in point, my playing partner teed up to the right on the final hole 9th (we started back 9). It was a good one, but unfortunately on the slope. Instead of playing it out and taking his medicine, he decided to go for it at an awkward angle, with the ball almost at his waist height due to the slope. He was essentially swinging an axe.

One swing, the ball hopped and moved backwards. This guy is a low teen handicapper and he had just whiffed the ball. He claimed his iron was snagged by the grass and he lost his swing plane. Second swing and blam, shank, it’s still in the hill. Third and SHANK! It goes to the top of the hill.

Fourth shot out and rolled into a drain about 50 metres off the green. Fifth penalty. Sixth he sends it back of the green in deep rough. Seventh, chipped out, flew past the hole and almost greenside bunker. Eight chipped too far. Nine, missed, and folded with a 10, on a par 4. Boom. He still shot 92 with that 10, so imagine if he hadn’t screw up.

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Aesthetics (4/5)

What can we say? While Bunga Raya was nice enough, crossing over to the palm, it’s easy to get blown away. We’re talking about a major character here on this course. This is like the Tom Cruise of Golf Courses in Malaysia. Compare it with, say, UPM or Nilai Springs, which are essentially like Awang Bin Amri or Lim Chin Ho. Don’t know who the heck these guys are? They are bit actors in Cerekerama and a few Chinese Series. I just made up their names, but that just further strengthens my point: Saujana Palm blows these sorry excuse of golf courses away. BLAM!

It’s a mixture of water, undulation, palm trees, jungle vegetation, wide fairways, narrow fairways, big/small greens. It’s like a Bollywood movie. It has everything! Dance, songs, fights, comedy, drama, thriller, horror, politics, love…the whole she-bang. The par 5 13th has an elevated tee shot that overlooks a very reachable green in 2. A great drive and a great 3 wood to clear the water and you’re there.

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Hole 14 is the toughest on the course because it is narrow and long, and filled with well-meaning bunkers. Well meaning to mash up your balls! Golf balls, that is.

I really like the 17th. I hit (finally) a perfect tee sailing from right to left and landed only about 40 meters away. It’s an extreme L shape dogleg left, with water on the left side. As for the 18th, this was where I watched Prom whacked the heck out of his golf ball during the Malaysian Open in 2007. As I was standing there, I hit a great tee shot about 250m, hit a crappy 7 about 100m and then hit the shot of my life with my six to 5 feet pin high. In my joy, I proceeded to miss the dang birdie putt but at least ended a rough nine with two pars.

The par 3 second is both beautiful and vicious. It’s like that bad girl in GI Joe, who looks hot and ultra bad. Or Zhang ZiYi in Rush Hour 2. Or AnakSunamon in the Mummy. Take your pick.

The Baroness  KILLER LOOKS Zhang plays an assassin in \'\'Rush Hour 2\'\' Rush Hour 2, Ziyi Zhang Patricia-Velasquez1.jpg Anaksunamun picture by icarus78

It’s a moderately long hole, 172 yards, but anything short, you have bunkers or it will roll down a 45 degree gradient into the jungle. Anything long and you got an adventure coming back because the green has an extreme drop off and yes, the hole is located at the bottom of the drop off. I hit long (thinking it was 172 metres) and by a stroke of luck, managed to hit my 60 degree soft, landed on the edge and trickled into the green….and it rolled, and rolled…and rolled and rolled….and rolled. YIKES! No wonder it was dubbed the most difficult hole in the country!

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Fun Factor (5/5)

Where to start? Teeing off at 10, it’s a wide nice fairway but the small bunker traps any hookers that stray too near the left side. My first par came on the 12th, where a stray tee shot was recovered from the thick rough.  The very next hole is the reachable par 5 which I proceeded to butcher it with excess force.

The par 4 4th is also reachable from the tee if you hit massive, a dogleg left with water flanking the side. The elevation gives you a good view to strategise. Our strategy has been perfected for every par-4 and par-5:

Smart Golfer inner voice: Hey man, this is short hole, just lay it up with a 3 or 5 wood and you have a full 8-iron in. You’re hitting your eight iron well, man.

Me: Hmm, that’s right, inner voice. Maybe I should —

Stupid, egoistical Golfer inner voice: Eh, dumbo, you pay so much for driver to leave in bag issit? See, the other fella also take out driver mah, after you no face leh. Might as well tee off ladies tee lah, play so chicken.

Me: Darn, you’re right, stupid, egoistical inner voice! Smart Golfer inner voice, I banish you forever! DRIVER!

And I hammered the ball straight into the water. Yaay.

Anyway, you get the gist of it. I know golf is supposed to be with people who make it fun but I am thoroughly convinced that if I were to play alone in Saujana palm, I’d still have one of the most enjoyable game ever. It’s a course that interacts with you, because there’s so much thinking to be done. Obviously, we are not the thinking type which is reflected in our ballooning scores but ah heck, maybe another day.

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Conclusion

Saujana Palm, aka Cobra gets two thumbs and two big toe up from us. We generally hate courses that blow their own trumpet (please see review on Bukit Unggul), but after hacking away the premium course in Malaysia, I can safely say: this is the best course we’ve played so far. If you can afford it, or you know someone willing to subsidise or you have a choice of clubs to choose from for your company event (charged to your company of course), choose Saujana Palm. If not, sell a kidney in the blackmarket. Either way, you gotta play this course.

IMG_0633.jpg picture by gilagolf

The good: Great, great character. Every hole is an adventure, and the game will definitely end too quickly for you on this course. The rough is challenging and the undulating greens and fairways will definitely give you a little fit or two.

The bad: Pricing obviously, but if you had a choice between Mines and Saujana, hands down, take the latter. We also caught Saujana palm on a moderately bad day on fairways and greens, as the condition wasn’t immaculate.

The skinny: 34 of 40 divots (85%). Argh! Few more divots for the elusive DAGTH!!! This definitely wasn’t predetermined because I really thought this course will be the one to get it. What do we need for DAGTH, Pebble Beach?!

Saujana – Palm (Cobra) Score Card

Saujana GCC Information

Address:

Saujana Golf And Country Club
P.O. Box 8148, Kelana Jaya,
46783 Petaling Jaya,
Selangor Darul Ehsan, Malaysia

Contact: +603-78461466

Fax: +603-78467818

Email: golf@saujana.com.my

Website: http://www.saujana.com.my/

A short Commercial Break

I just started another blog called So You Are Fired…What Now? You can access it here.

So if you’re stopping by this one, have a look at the other one. I’m trying to provide some helpful data for those that are in career transition (a nicer way of saying, darn, I’m out of job and got no money to buy dog food, because I’m still playing too much golf), like resume writing, cover letters, vertical markets data, severance packages, employee rights etc. I was searching for all this, and thought it’d be good to capture a bit of the experience so that others might find it useful (hopefully no one is in that stage!).

So drop by and give me some helpful comments on how to improve/make it better. It’s not only for the fired, but hopefully I can put in some useful contents even for the career and corporate folks. I mean 11 years in corporate, I MUST HAVE acquired some skill aside from playing golf! C’mon!

At the meantime, I just had a pretty lousy game at the Cobra Course in Saujana but it’s a really superb course. Can it achieve the elusive DAGTH status? We’ll see!

Gilagolf all the way!

New Guest Post Feature

Now, I’ve been getting a lot of great and useful comments lately. Some have great updates on the courses that I have long banished from my memory (Frasers or Selesa), but might have some improvement in it over the past years or months. I’ll be adding in a “Guest Post” category at the end of each review and if your comments are very useful, and reasonably long to be considered a review, i’ll be using the time tested technology called copy-and-paste for this smacking new hi-tech feature. It’s awesome, this copy-and-paste technology, I tells you….

Anyways, I hope Khawar doesn’t mind as I put his ‘review’ up on Nilai Springs for the ‘guest post’ column. I am hopeful to get more participation from readers, as this blog, after 2 years in existence is finally getting some hits crawling up to 100,000 views with average of 150 views per day.

I’m hoping to review A Famosa, Saujana Cobra Course, Port Klang, Port Dickson Course, unless someone else has already hacked up those courses and reviewed it!

Mines Resort and Golf

Introduction

I used to work around Sri Kembangan area, and every morning I’d drive on the highway looking over the mining lake at the green grass of Mines Resort and Golf Club, and often wondered when will I ever make enough cash per month to actually go and play there, since I heard that the green fees are exorbitant. Now there are a few reasons to that:

1)      Tiger Woods played there before for the World Cup Golf 1999. Lots of pictures of him around the club. So many in fact, I think the local Church of Tiger Woods hold their mass here and light candles and sing songs for him. Creepy. I don’t think he’s coming back, Church of Tiger Woods.

2)      Robert Trent Jones designed that course. If you don’t know who he is, well, be like me and Wiki him. All golfers should have some knowledge of these designers so at least we can pretend that we know more about the game than just destroying golf courses.

3)      By pricing it astronomically, it will discourage world class hacks like this writer to decapitate the course, therefore, saving millions on course maintenance fees. Seems like a sound business model, except the only players on a typical weekday on that course are the native gerbils and the occasional squirrel.

The last I know about the green fee was about RM400 per person. Now I believe this is a myth. I don’t know how anyone would be psycho enough to fork 400 bucks to pay for 18 holes, unless it’s St Andrews, Pebble Beach, Augusta or TPC Sawgrass. Definitely not me. I don’t think any of you reading this article as well, unless you earn in USD. In which case, maybe you can donate some cash to me for me to continue reviewing courses?

How I got there? I suddenly I found myself there, invited for a closed tournament to raise charity. Since I didn’t need to cough up the dough, I was more than willing to take a look at the mythical Mines Resort and Golf Club.

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Travel (3/5)

You basically want to get to the Palace of the Golden Horses in Mines. To get there, there are 2 good ways to get there: from the North South highway and from the Bukit Jalil highway.

1)      North-South: Get to the North South highway. For gila readers, you should be as familiar with this highway as you are familiar with your own mother. Serious. This is the gateway to all your golfing paradise. Once on the highway, keep left, you want to turn up the mines flyover before the toll. Look for signs on the left to the Palace of the Golden Horses. By the way, the this is a hotel, not some kind of massage parlour as the name might suggest. Follow the turnoff and you’ll end up in a mini roundabout. Take a 3 o’clock and keep left. You DON’T want to turn down to the Sg Besi Highway again or you’ll have a first hand experience of the brainless way Malaysian roads are made, with the only U-turn 50 kilometres away. Take a left instead and you’ll see the hotel on the right. Just follow along the road and you’ll eventually reach Mines Resort and Golf.

mines2.jpg picture by gilagolf

2)      The Bukit Jalil highway: Take the LDP from PJ heading towards Sunway. Pass the Sunway toll, head straight, go by Kinrara and Bukit Jalil all the way. You’ll see Astro HQ on the left and hit the mini roundabout we spoke about.

mines1.jpg picture by gilagolf

Along the way, don’t be distracted with those houses that look like clubhouses. These are actually private residence, no doubt put there with the express purpose to make us mid-class citizens feel bad about our little terrace homes. I’d like to tee up a driver right at their windows.

Price(0/5)

Before we even start to talk about the course, the myth of RM400 green fees, unfortunately has not been dispelled. As mentioned, I had a free pass that day and after the game, I was just too darn tired to go up to the counter and ask for pricing. All I know was that a member had to bring you in, and you still had to donate a kidney to play here. If someone does confirm that mines costs RM400 for green fees, we’re going to dip it down to negative. As such, we’re willing to be as unbiased as possible and give it just 0. A positive 0, based on unfounded rumours, just like all the articles in our Star Newspaper and New Straits Times. This is what journalist call, creative integrity.

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First thoughts

For the price you pay, you have certain expectations. Face it, that’s how life is. You pay RM10k for a Proton Tiara, you’d perceive it as a piece of junk, which it is. 200K for a BMW, you expect it to perform. If that 200K BMW performs like a junk, you get pissed off. If that Tiara performs like a junk, you’re glad it’s performing at all. Actually, 10K will be too much to pay for the Tiara.

Bear in mind, at RM400 green fees (again, stand to be corrected), you want something mind blowing. Something that takes Saujana and Tropicana and KGNS and spit on them. Something that ranks up there with Pebble Beach or at least gives you an indication that you are some Saudi oil magnate coming to play. You are the king, it has to be something that’s so darn special, you want to take some grass with you, some sand from the bunker and preserve it for your children.

So it was rather strange, standing on the 13th tee (we had a shotgun start) and seeing the grass is just grass, the sand is just sand. In other words: what the heck is the big deal??

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Service (3/5)

We had 2 caddies for our flight. Unfortunately, I always seem to end up with the apprentice. The guy wasn’t that bad (not in looks, I mean in reading the greens), but wasn’t extremely good as well, unlike the other guy hanging out with the other twosome in the other buggy. He read the first green well and I promptly sunk a par putt to start things off. Things began to derail from the 18th (my 5th hole) onwards, when I sunk in a 10. In a tournament, a 10 means certain death. I mean 10! What the heck! Although that’s probably 99% my fault, still, I had to blame someone, so the caddy gets it.That wasn’t too bad, but on the second, fourth and ninth, I had easy putts that were read wrongly and lipped out. I can’t remember if I didn’t listen to him, or he didn’t offer me good advice. Either way, we had to fork out 60 bucks for his service.

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Still, we’re giving a three because Mines is generally well known for good service. They attend to you, tag your bags properly and generally do what a RM400 green fee course should be doing. And the changing room is pretty good. I wanted to take a picture of it, but was afraid that they might jail me for indecent pictures of fat, naked men walking around after golf.

Fairways (4/5)

Ah, now we’re talking.

The Bermuda turf withstood the previous night’s rain pretty well as we had very consistent fairways throughout. It still wasn’t as nice as Tropicana’s in comparison, but it had a carpet-like quality to it, and the drainage was very good. We still managed to mutilate this nice sheet of green blanket with our lousy play but hey, at least it was good while it lasted.

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Greens (4/5)

The greens, likewise were almost perfect. There were a few holes that were patchy, but I’d attribute it to traffic over the day, since we had close to 10 flights, which is probably the same amount that visited this place last year.

I found the green pretty straightforward, without the extreme up and downs or trickiness of Saujana…its only my darn problem that I can’t get the ball in! Darn you caddy!!

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Rough (3/5)

I had no issues with the rough but the bunkers weren’t optimum, with the sand hard packed enough to use pitching wedge to dig in. I was having quite a time with my wedge, especially on the 17th when I pitched in. Normally, hard packed sand would be deemed passable but not when you have a reputation of being the most expensive golf club in Malaysia! I want that fluffy white sand that when you hit it, it comes out in a cloud of white powdery dust!

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Aesthetics (4/5)

Throughout the game, Mines offers a lot of wow. As in, Wow, haven’t I seen this before? Sure! Just head to Clearwaters! The par 4 12th especially with the lake on the left and a slight dogleg left, brings to mind one of the holes with similar set up in Clear waters. I realize that there’s only so much one can do with a golf course before the design starts repeating but hey, if I can recall this, it must really be quite common, since I have a memory of a dingbat.

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The lake really puts a lot of beauty to it, but I wish there were a little more variety, but this is a mining course, so don’t expect a whole lot of trees surrounding it. The par 3s are generally quite pretty, I liked the 7th hole, where the green is ensconced in a little U shape dell, with bushes all around it. Hit it too hard, left or right and it’s into snake land.

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Fun Factor (4/5)

It’s quite impossible not to have fun in a tournament with 10 flights and a shotgun start. I started off pretty well from 13th, with par on the first hole and 4 bogeys, including one pitched in. I unraveled on the 18th with a 10 on a par 5 after shanking 2 balls into deep woods. Let’s see: first shot hit a tree. Second shot tried to slice it around, ended up shanking. Third is on a slope, shank again. (Ever noticed once you start shanking you’re pretty much SCREWED?) Fourth one, decided to play out, hit the darn tree, still in rough. Fifth one pitched out. Sixth one pitched to the green, over. $#*#(@!! Chip back, roll past hole to fringe for 7. Eight, aggressive putt, missed hole. Ninth, easy 4 footer downhill missed. Ended with bloody 10.

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I played 4 bogeys after, then went on a par-birdie-par before double bogeying the 8th and 12th (my last hole) after horrendous tee shots.

One thing about mines was that it really allowed you to recover your shots. There’s not much OB except for the occasional jungle lying up the sides, but you could easily avoid that by aiming to the other side. Now, that is a real genius advice, isn’t it?

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Conclusion

There’s really no way to win anything by pricing green fees so high. The overwhelming feeling we had when we left the place was: it’s a nice course, interesting holes, great maintenance, but would it be worth the price of admission? Probably not. This was probably the first and only time we’ll be coming to Mines Resort and Golf. It’s better to use the money and go Saujana or something. Or Tropicana or even KGNS.

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The good: Great greens, fairway in good shape even after downpour; pretty easily accessible.

The bad: Price. We’ll need to confirm it but if it’s really RM400 or so, it’s just too crazy to pay for a round of 18. Especially when the course doesn’t have that great a character. Better to travel further and play at Clearwaters.

The skinny: 25 of 40 divots (62.5%).

The Gilagolfer Returns

Just a quick shout out to the Gila Fans…I know I’ve been sucking at updating this site, but things are now changing. I have now unlimited time to play golf since I have joined in the statistics of the ‘Penganggurs of Malaysia’, i.e guys that got the pink slip, or in this case, the call of death while playing golf.

Will be updating soon!

A Letter To Y.E

http://blog.al.com/birmingham-news-sports/2009/08/large_Yang%20wins%20081609.jpg

Dear Y.E.,

First of all, congratulations for smacking down the world number 1 golfer in the 91st PGA Championship, the fourth Major of the calendar golf year, and being the biggest, greatest Asian golfer of all time.

Apologies at hand for literally looking down on your chances, but seriously, how could  anyone predict:

1) You making two shots on the final day when everyone else on the leaderboard played like 18 handicapped hookers. As in ball hookers, you know. Golf balls.

2) You getting that eagle chip in on the drivable 14th. Seriously, they set those up for Tiger to put in, not you. You must have missed the unofficial advertisers briefing. But you know what, you don’t speak English, so you probably didn’t get what those white sponsors were saying anyway.

3) You escaping from various positions on the course a’la Tiger. I mean, that punch out from one of the holes on the first 9…that was pretty amazing stuff. Tiger’s supposed to do it you know, according to the advertisers..oh wait, forget it.

4) You being the first Asian to hold a major trophy. Now, we can finally stick it to our bosses who refuses our leaves to play golf, and you’ve proven that tiny little asian dudes who don’t speak a word of English can not only win a Major, but beat the greatest player in the world, and also giving him a headstart of 2 strokes, and finally walloping him 3 strokes. I mean seriously, that means, you scored a massive 5-0 on Tiger Woods. You ARE the greatest player in the world Y.E Yang.

5) You not being able to speak English. I thought it was amazing that the PGA official holding the mic while you were speaking in the award ceremony would be nodding as if he understood what you were saying. I understood Korean, and I know you had your interpreter filter it out for you, because you said, “To all those who think a short, yellow skin, oriental guy cannot stand up to strong, burly, black americans, I stick this to you: Asians rock. We rule the world and the massive army of Asian golfers will now march across your american homeland and conquer every blade of grass in the Augustas and Sawgrasses of your kingdom and rule with our iron wedges. All will submit under the eastern golf empire!” At this point, your cackling made the crew visibly uncomfortable and they had to yank the mic away from you. But hey, we support your, Y.E.

A little note of worry though. We know that KJ Choi is literally worshipped back in Korea, and any Korean golfers who would be persumptuous enough to win a major before KJ gets his might get into an awful lot of trouble. The KJ clan might send some ninjas to get you. If so, our home is always open for you. We did sense a little bit of worry in you when Tiger began playing like a dog.

That’s why you smiled when you three putted the 17th. But that useless Tiger bogeyed it also!!

And then the 18th, when you knew there was a tree in front of you. You wanted to hit it, right? So you would lose the tournament but everyone would say how brave you were to challenge the tree. You hit it flush and God knows how you avoided that tree.

Finally, Tiger over chipped and you know, there was nothing you could do.But to win.

And what a win it was. A win for Korea, a win for Asians, a win for the entire world of Underdogs. This would be how we felt if Tom Watson had the guts to win the British Open. But this is way better, because you’re one of us, and you stuck it to the best that America had to offer.

Regards,

Gilagolf Editorial Team

Tiger Woods and the Quest for another Major

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OK. Its the final round of a major championship and El Tigre has a two stroke lead.

What more are you asking for?

5 Reasons Tiger will be winning the PGA Championship 2009 at Hazeltine.

1) The course – Tiger HATES Hazeltine. Seriously, he e-mailed me before he teed up last week. Because the last time he played here, he allowed an overweight, part-timer to steal his thunder and left him runner up to a major. The overweight part-timer now is ranked 50,000 on the charts just below David Duval (don’t bother checking, already verified). so El Tigre is extremely mad…it’s like having a 1 year old girl beating you in a 100 meter dash, crawling, and distracted by a little rubber ball, and still ahead of you by an hour.

2) The champion- He’s got Padraig, who for a while supplanted Woods as the serial major winner, so Woods has a lot to prove to this Irish bloke. Like pounding him into the ground and shouting, “DO-NOT-THINK-YOU-ARE-ME!!!!!”

3) The group – He’s got the multi talented, world class golfer called Y.E Yang in his final group. That’s right. I don’t know how they screwed up and paired this guy up with Tiger. Shouldn’t they just put Padraig head to head with him? Why put a little asian dude there? I don’t have anything against little asian dudes, since I am one, but seriously, at least pair Tiger up with a guy who can stand up to him, like Padraig, and who can apply a bit of pressure on Tiger. With this Yang guy in the group, Tiger’s going to keep thinking he’s playing alone, since he has to look 45 degree downwards to spot his playing partner. No pressure, big win for sure.

4) The Vengeance – Imagine first team Manchester United losing to the Torquay British Boy Clubs in the FA Cup final. Or the Lakers getting thrashed by the International School of Pygmies in Zukanda. Or Usain Bolt losing to a crawling 1 year old girl, distracted by a rubber ball in a 100 meter dash. The next opponent better be careful, because these champions come back with a vengeance. It’s like personally spitting them in the face, insulting their mother and daring them to give you back their best spit. Tiger got booted and humiliated in the British Open. He’s really pissed. He’s going to get this championship no matter what.

5) The Federer Factor – This is true. Woods is so darn bored with the potentless competition in the PGA Tour, he has resorted to compete with another dude playing in another tour, in another sport. Federer just bagged in major number 15. Guess what major number is our tiger chasing?

So, any bets against him?

Late British Open Prediction

With Tiger amazingly missing the cut and our all time favourite David Duval also playing like a dog and earning an early flight home, to say this years Open is a disappointment is the understatement of the year.

Just look at the leader board for pete’s sake.

Lee Westwood.

Matthew Goggin.

Tom Watson.

What??

Obviously I haven’t really followed the Open closely since Mr Woods decided to travel half way round the world for zero winnings. Face it, golf is a real boring sport to watch. And here’s a 59 year old dude, who’s the same age as my dad, plugging his way around the course, possibly earning in the last 10 years as much as Tiger’s car washer gets as tips.

Incredible. How can you not support a 59 year old geezer to win the Open??

Go, TW!

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